Ever since it happened, time seemed to be off course as well. It went by quickly, yet slow, though I know that doesn’t seem to make sense, it was the only way I think I can describe it. Just then I realized there was a bowl of soup in front of me, chicken noodle; my favourite. For how long had it been sitting there I had no idea. I took a spoonful. It was cold. Dad must have brought it in a while ago without me noticing. I looked to my right, Penelope’s bowl was empty. I wondered how long ago she realized it was there because her face was expressionless like mine. I hardly noticed she was with me at all even though over the last  two weeks we had never been separated. I looked at the clock again; it was 10:55 am now. I had just been learning how to tell time in school but it still took me a moment or two to figure it out. In 5 minutes dad was going to come in, tell us to turn off the television and get in the truck to drive the hour and a half trip to Hamilton Hospital, just like yesterday, and the day before, for two weeks now; well actually thirteen days to be exact. Tomorrow will be two weeks.

            By 11:03 am we were in dad’s truck on our way. I barely noticed the difference between the living room and the truck; I barely noticed anything anymore. Penelope had her head on the window, she might have been thinking of something, school maybe; but maybe not. I felt my eyes droop. I didn’t want them to; I didn’t want to fall asleep. I knew what I would see. But within minutes the soft hum of the motor and warm air from the heater carried me to sleep.

            “Penelope, which one is your favourite?” I asked looking at her large pile of new toys and stuffed animals.

            “Definitely the platypus,” Penelope replied, holding it to her chest.

            “Ok, Penelope, you can keep one present with you in the car but the rest need to go in the trunk. We’ll take them out when we get home ok sweetie?” mom said as she began to pick up all the toys.

            “Bye Penelope! Happy birthday, I had a lot of fun swimming!” Penelope’s best friend called as she left with her parents, “Only two more months and I’ll be ten too! Double digits!” Penelope grimed and waved enthusiastically still holding her stuffed platypus.

            I yawned and looked around. That was the last of Penelope’s friends that needed to get picked up. We were waiting for Sarah. She always took so long getting ready; I didn’t understand why, we were just going home now. It must have something to do with being a teenager, I thought to myself staring at the change room door. She wasn’t really even a teenager yet; not until March. She was only twelve, but still, that was a lot older than me; though I did feel like the second grade had matured me significantly.

            “Come on,” I moaned out loud. I was sick of looking at all Penelope’s presents, I just wanted to go home and play with mine. I still had my brand new stuffed puppy I just got for Christmas. He was my favourite.

            I was practicing typing my shoelaces when Sarah finally came out. “Why the long face Maddy! What is everyone waiting for? I want to go home, I taped Friends and I want to watch it tonight before I go to bed,” Sarah said twirling her now dry ponytail- no wonder she took so long. Penelope and I gave Sarah a dirty look as we got up and headed for the van.

            It was snowing, not the soft pretty snow that sometimes came down and made everything look like a fairytale, but hard snow that whipped my face. We were all bundled up in scarves, hats, mitts, and coats but I could still feel the cold cut through me. I shivered, furiously trying to open the locked door.

            “Madeline, when you do that I can’t unlock it. I know it’s cold but you need to wait,” mom said. I could tell she was getting frustrated but not angry.

            “Let’s all sit in the back together,” Penelope said, hopping into the backseat. I of course always got stuck being in the middle because I was the youngest. It really wasn’t fair at all, but then again, it was Penelope’s birthday, I decided not to say anything.

            “Feel how soft my platypus is Maddy! He’s so soft!” Penelope said holding it out to me. I petted him. He was very soft, oh he was so soft and I was so tired. I just wanted to cuddle him all the way home.

            “My puppy’s softer I think”, I lied, Penelope’ smile faltered, she looked crushed, “But your platypus is still soft too,” I added trying to make it up to her.

            “Sarah, feel!” said Penelope.

            “I don’t care, Penelope,” Sarah replied, rolling her eyes.

            “Fine,” she said indifferently, “I’m calling him Pladdy.”

            I giggled. For the next ten minutes, the three of us sat in silence. I was counting all the toys at home in my head. Penelope was playing with Pladdy and Sarah looked like she was thinking hard about something. Of what I had no idea; she probably had a lot to think about. I would think everything has more to think about when they are older. I pondered this for a moment or two and then continued to count my toys again. I kept dosing off and losing count.

            “I’m so tired,” Penelope said with a huge yawn.

            “Oh me too,” I replied with an agreeing yawn, “really, really tired.”

            “Let’s put the seat down, so it will be more comfortable,” she said finally finishing her yawn.

            Sarah turned to face us, “no. I don’t want to We’re almost home can’t you wait?” she asked.

            “No!” Penelope and I both groaned.

            “Well you won’t be able to do it with me sitting here,” she said, folding her arms stubbornly.

            “Sarah you always think you’re the best!” I yelled, suddenly angry.

            “That’s because I am the best, Madeline,” she sneered.

            “No you’re not!” Penelope said loudly, hitting Sarah.

            We all began fighting in the back seat until mom suddenly pulled the van over to the side of the road. “Do you girls need to wait outside to cool off?” she threatened.

            “No!” we all said immediately. All I could think about was the freezing air outside.

            “Good, because we’re almost home girls, we’ll be back at the house in two minutes. Now Sarah, I want you to come up to the front,” said mom.

            Sarah groaned. I felt pretty smug. It wasn’t usual that mom got Sarah into trouble at all. “Fine,” Sarah said harshly. There was a lot of jumble with Sarah trying to make her way to the front seat. I didn’t blame her. If I was the one who had to go in the front seat, I wouldn’t want to go outside either.

            Finally we settled again and mom started the car, Penelope and I smiled at each other and got more comfortable. “Sarah, put on your seat belt. You know better than that!” mom said sternly.

            “Fine,” Sarah snapped, reaching for the belt. “we’re going to be home in a minute anyway,” she added under her breath. Sarah reached for her seat belt when suddenly we all felt a jerk from the car. Mom was swerving, trying to regain control. I screamed. We had hit some black ice on the dirt road. I could tell even in my panic that mom was really scared too. She looked from side to side. We were on a steep hill with deep valleys on either side. I felt like we were on a terrifying roller coaster ride, only there was no excitement; no fun; only fear. We seemed to swerve for an eternity before the van finally dove off the road. I could hear branches breaking, even over our screaming voices. And then; nothing.

            I don’t know how long after, I woke up; hanging from my seat belt. To my left, I saw Penelope, she wasn’t moving. With difficulty, I turned forward searching for mom. Her face was in the steering wheel. A few seconds later she began to stir. She looked forward, then back at me. She seemed as though she was in some sort of weird dream, confused but not yet panicking. Everything was hazy, but I was oddly calm. Slowly, my eyes began to wander to the front seat.

            The window was smashed. Sarah’s head had gone through and was bloody against a tree trunk, barely visible through the blood and broken glass. Mom seemed to realize what had happened a second after me. She yelped, like a dog in pain. The noise woke Penelope.

            “Sarah, wake up,” I said to her. As though this must be some sort of joke or mistake. This couldn’t really be happening, “wake up, wake up,” I was cold but my cheeks burned as hot tears formed making their way down my face.

            Penelope was still trying to get out of her seat belt. I could see a few cuts on her face and one of her eyes was puffy. She looked frightening. Mom looked at me, then turned to Penelope, “I need you to run to the Wilkinson’s house up the hill on the right. You know where it is. Call 911. You need to climb out, the door is jammed but I think you’ll fit through the window. I need you to go out on the other side and help push Sarah’s head up so that it’s not on the glass,” mom said this all very quickly, in a very matter of fact sort of way but we knew it was not going to be that simple. Our road had only four houses on it. None very close together. It was still snowing. I could tell Penelope was thinking this too. She had a long way to run and what she needed to do first was going to be even more of a challenge.

            “Maddy, I need you too, get the blankets from the back,” mom said to me. I made my way to the trunk to grab them and then returned to the front. Everything was difficult to manoeuvre because the car was turned on its side from the crash. Penelope was already outside and making her way to the passenger side of the van.

            “Ready, Penelope? On the count of three, we’re going to lift Sarah’s head and then Maddy,” she turned to me now, “you’re going to put the blankets down. One, two, three…”

            Neither I nor Penelope was ready but we did as mom instructed. I looked at her. “Penelope, go! Run! Maddy, Sweetie I need you to honk the horn ok? As loud as you can, it’s really important honey.”

            I nodded and climbed into the driver’s seat. A million things were running through my mind. Will anyone hear us? Is Penelope ok? I’m cold. Is Sarah going to die? What time is it? It felt as though we had crashed hours ago into this valley. My thumbs were aching from pressing the horn for so long, so hard.

            I heard a branch snap (or maybe it was a twig) and jumped. My hand slipped and I accidentally hit the four ways button. Stunned for a moment I looked around. The lights might help so I decided to leave them on. In front of me was the rearview mirror. I hadn’t noticed it until now. Slowly I looked up to see my reflection.

            My face was unrecognizable. It was ghostly white. I had a cut on my forehead that had caused blood to trail down my face. I was scared. It looked like a bad dream, a nightmare I never wanted to see again. I tried to push the image out of my mind and focused on the loud sound of the horn.

            I felt like another hour had gone by, though now that I look back, it must have been only a few minutes, and I heard a knock on the window. Mom and I both screamed. It was Paul Wilkinson, and he brought dad too. It took a few tries to get the driver’s door dislodged but together they managed to get it open. Their faces were friendly but I could tell they were both as scared as I was. Sarah was still unconscious but dad assured m that the ambulance was coming really soon.

            Dad lifted me gently out of the van and carried me to his truck. Penelope was already inside. Tearstained and pale she was clutching her platypus. Her eyes wide, staring at nothing. A few cuts were still bleeding on her face and hands and her puffy eye had already become a definite bruise. Finally our eyes met. We hugged and held on tight. It seemed like we were together for only a second before we heard the sounds of sirens break the cold silence. Three fire trucks, two ambulances and a police car arrived.

            A fireman came to the truck to see Penelope and I. He had a kind face. I can’t remember exactly what he said to us but he took Penelope away and gave me a teddy bear to hold on to. The only thing I can remember I that he said “hold on to this little guy for me, and don’t worry, you’ll see your sister soon.” The beat was soft but with Penelope now gone I felt like one third of a person. I buried my tears into his soft face. I had never felt so alone.  

            Soon after, another fireman knocked on my window. He took me and my new bear to the ambulance. As I walked with him from the truck to the ambulance I could see the group of firemen and paramedics down by the van trying to get Sarah out. I hugged my bear a little tighter wishing I was hugging my sisters. The fireman looked down at me wish a sad smile and squeezed my shoulder. I nervously climbed into the ambulance. Penelope was on a stretcher and I had to sit in a chair beside her. We held hands the whole way.

            The drive to the hospital seemed quick. And it felt good to lie down once I was there, though I was separated from Penelope and I had no idea where Sarah went. The hospital finally let us leave at 2:00 am. Dad picked us up. Sarah had been transferred to Hamilton Hospital and mom went with her. He told us that she was going into a coma and had to have surgery. Penelope and I said very little to each other on the way home but we held each other tightly. We slept in the same room that night.

            Everything was blurry, dad was shaking me gently, “Madeline, wake up honey, we’re here. Let’s go see mom and Sarah, though she was never awake. As I turned the corner of Sarah’s hallway I began to feel like I might cry. But I couldn’t. Maybe there were no more tears left, Penelope seemed to feel my dread and hold my hand. We walked into the room together.

            As horrible as it was, I was now accustomed to Sarah’s unsettling appearance. She had deep gashes along her chin and neck where it had lain on the broken glass. Her head was wrapped in bandages and she had dark bruises on her face and arms. I sat there with Penelope for a while. Mom and dad left the room to give us some time, and mom a break as well. She had been living at some sort of hotel in Hamilton that was for people with family in the hospital. Penelope and I talked to Sarah, trying to make it sound like everything was ok. We didn’t want her to think we had been suffering the entire time she was in the hospital. I don’t know if he could hear us at all. But that day, I think she must have.

            “Hi,” she said. And that was it. Just hi. Her eyes were still closed but she was there; really there! She wasn’t just a vegetable. I burst into tears at the same moment as Penelope. We were so happy. We hugged her and then hugged each other. That was all we needed for now. Hi was wonderful for now. Sarah was going to be ok. My big sister, my friend, my role model; I never realized how much I needed her. How much I need her.

With a delicate brush
She combs her long auburn hair

She seems not to see me
As I explore the wonders
Of her bureau
Glittering crystal bottles
Entice me with intoxicating scents
I search for more treasures

Soft lace
Of her dress
Pretty rings and necklaces
Daddy gave it to her

Almost ready
She smoothes on her lipstick
A delicate pink
She looks like an angel
Daddy agrees

-Marilyn Monroe